It’s no secret that today’s television programs are filled to the brim with sex and cursing, and if we just let you watch whatever you wanted it would be completely irresponsible of us. So, without further ado, here are eight TV shows that you are not allowed to watch.
1. Shrinking
We appreciate that this show takes a positive view toward mental health and explores both the benefits and limitations of therapy, but if they can’t figure out how to do it without all the cursing, then we’re not letting our readers watch it. If we catch you watching Shrinking, you’re going to lose TV privileges the entire week.
2. The Sopranos
The Sopranos is filled with so much sex and drugs that it might as well be featured on PornoVideos.com. There’s nothing “artistic” about shooting guns and saying four-letter words. And don’t get us started on the nudity in this show! The Sopranos is absolutely off-limits, and if we find out you watched it, you can’t drive ClickHole’s car anywhere for a whole month.
3. Bluey
Talking animals are a crime against nature. No Bluey.
4. Game Of Thrones
Our friend Lucy Donaldson-Bryce told us what happens in this show, and you’re definitely not allowed to watch it. It’s basically like if they made an X-rated porno film into a TV show. We don’t care if your friends are allowed to see it, ClickHole forbids you from watching Game Of Thrones. You’re not allowed to read the books, either.
5. Real Time With Bill Maher
Don’t try to tell us that this is a “news show.” Bill Maher is not a news anchor. Walter Cronkite was a news anchor. Edward R. Murrow was a news anchor. Bill Maher is a punk with a real nasty mouth on him. We’ve heard some clips of his show and we are not impressed to say the least. Don’t let us catch you watching Real Time, or we’re not going to let you go on dates with your significant other for a year.
6. Somebody Feed Phil
People should not go to other countries to eat food. People should stay at home and eat groceries in the country they’re from. Plus, we heard from our friend Lucy Donaldson-Bryce that Phil gets naked in this show and reveals his p*nis. You’re not allowed to watch Somebody Feed Phil and if we catch you doing so, we are throwing your Nintendo in the garbage.
7. JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure
Our friend Lucy Donaldson-Bryce says her nephew watched this show and started piercing his nose. It’s easy to see why: JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure is absolutely depraved and full of you-know-what (sex and you-know-what (violence)). We tried to watch it and had to turn it off after about 15 seconds. We couldn’t even understand what was going on in this animo show, but we know that it’s inappropriate for our readers. Animo is cartoons from Japan, and honestly, it makes sense. What do you expect from the country that created sex-crazed, hyper-violent media like Ms. Pac-Man and The Wind Rises? ClickHole readers are forbidden from watching JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure. The only media from Japan you’re allowed to watch is Tetsuo: The Iron Man, since it teaches important lessons about the dangers of turning into a motorcycle.
